Goffstown’s Mike Skinner is a survivor of childhood sex trafficking at the hands of his parents. Two of his siblings took their own lives. He feels that trauma, particularly childhood trauma, lies beneath and is a definitive factor of what is termed “mental illness.” If you get run over by a Mack truck there will be tire tracks.
The statistics from the CDC are sobering. One out of four women is sexually abused by the age of 18 and one half all reported rapes occur before that same age. Nearly one out of four men in the U.S. experience some form of contact sexual violence in their lifetime.
Skinner has traveled extensively in North America and has given presentations and musical performances to groups as diverse as police chiefs at a conference sponsored by the State Department, the United Nations and Georgetown University, and women inmates in a Hawaiian penitentiary.
Q: You’re working on a book-length memoir that chronicles the severe abuses that you suffered as a child and how you found healing. Why is your story important?
A: I feel it’s important because it’s not just about me. The amount of people who have dealt with childhood abuse and maltreatment is staggering. They can’t even put numbers on that. One in five people will deal with a mental health challenge in their life but two-thirds of those people will not seek treatment because of stigma and discrimination. Part of my sharing my own personal story is to help break down those barriers so that people can understand that they’re not alone in this. There is healing out there.
Q: You prefer the term “mental health injuries” to “mental illness.” Why?
A: I’ve been at this for a few decades now, since 1993, and I’ve learned a lot. Just in my travels around the country as an advocate and educator and at my performances, I’ve met a lot of people and have read a lot. What I have found is that people are dealing with a wealth of traumas that play havoc on the mind, body, soul and spirit. These are injuries. There is no basis for a diagnosis of mental illness. It’s not a brain disease.
Q: How can mental health practitioners treat sexual and physical trauma survivors more effectively?
A: They need to be willing to listen, to validate and to honor. They also need to do their own work. A lot of people go into the helping professions because they’ve been wounded themselves. In a counseling session when they say, “This is not the time to talk about it,” or “It’s in the past. You’ve got to move on and let it go,” really what they’re saying is “I don’t want to hear it.” I can only surmise here, but myself and other advocates feel this is because they have not done the healing themselves… It is hard to hear and I acknowledge that, but if we do our work it makes it easier to hear someone else’s story of pain and suffering.
Q: You addressed the National Press Club in Washington, D.C. What was that like and what were a few of your bullet points?
A: I was humbled to be there. To speak at this event about childhood trafficking at that time of the Bosnian-Serbian war and the trafficking of young children who were being taken in by the Catholic Church and other entities. A journalist was charged with finding out what was going on there. I was invited to speak as a survivor of trafficking. The journalist was astounded as it was shocking to her faith as a Catholic. She said to me, “Michael, how did I miss this?” I was concerned when I went to speak that in the room were a good 40 monks and priests…It was great because after I was done and applauded, they all came forward and I was like “What are they going to do, lynch me?” It was the opposite. They were extending their hands and asking if they could hug me and pray over me. They were all strong in their faith but they had all been sexually abused as children, some by priests and nuns. That was like “Wow!”
I’d always known that I was sexually abused but was unsure of why I was asked to speak about trafficking at the Georgetown conference. Christine Dolan, once head of CNN’s political reporting and spokesperson for Nelson Mandela said, “Michael, you were trafficked as a child. Your parents trafficked you.” I was stunned. I’d never thought of myself as a trafficking survivor…I was in my own denial.
Q: You founded The Surviving Spirit 20 years ago. What is its mission and how can someone be added to its monthly e-newsletter?
A: The feeling behind the Surviving Spirit is that through my travels I’d met some wonderful people at all levels, economic levels, employment levels, and they’d gone through abuse but still found ways to get through it…I wanted to focus on someone who’d written a book, was an artist or a poet. I wanted to share resources. The website also provides resources. When I first entered the mental health system the counselors didn’t know where they could refer me for help. You can sign up for the newsletter at www.survivingspirit.com. There is help out there…The question is not about what’s wrong with you. It’s about what happened to you.